One of the things that can suck up a lot of our time is doing things for others. This is particularly apparent if you have kids that still live at home. If you can empower others’ independence, you can get a lot of time back for yourself.
Through various family circumstances I was placed in charge of running a household at the age of 14. While I would never wish my particular circumstances on anyone else, the sense of being independent – and more competent than my peers at “adulting” – never left me. I have tried to give my daughter the same competency, although with a guiding hand rather than the sink-or-swim method I experienced. Yes, she started young, but her knowledge gives her independence and responsibility – and gives me time.
Laundry
My husband handles the laundry for me and him, with a few special care item exceptions. This goes back to our courtship, when his Navy training overwhelmed my laundry method. My daughter has been doing her own laundry since she has been big enough to reach the bottom of the washer with a step.
I never have to listen to complaints about not having clean clothes from either person, and there are never piles of laundry waiting for me to fold and put away. This gives me at least three hours back a week.
Lunches
My daughter has been responsible for her own school lunches since she was in grade school. It is well known that I am not a morning person, and my functioning is limited. After my daughter complained that the lunch packed the night before was soggy, I gave her the task of making her own lunches.
I did make it as easy as possible for her. There are always single-serve cups of fruit and pre-packaged snacks and desserts, as well as portioned baby carrots and sliced cucumbers. Of course, having things like this around meant that packing my lunch was much easier too. Even now that she comes home at lunch to eat in between her two high schools, she still will grab veggies or fruit if she has a long rehearsal in the afternoon.
Not having to pack lunches for anyone but myself means I don’t have to spend the twenty minutes every morning that I’m really not capable of giving.
Housework
With three people living in this house, it seems only fair that there should be three people doing the house maintenance. My husband mostly takes care of the outside; my allergies require masks, gloves and protective clothing to mow, trim or rake. Inside, my husband has the master bath, sheets and towels; my daughter has her own bathroom and room; and we divvy up the rest. I do the deep cleaning, since this keeps the house cleaner overall.
Not having all the housework fall on me gives me 1-2 hours back each week, and in the summer, an additional 1-2 hours a week.
Kitchen Navigation
“Mom, where is the cinnamon?” “Hun, where do we keep the salt?” Variations of these used to be common refrains in the house. And then I would have stop what I was doing, go to the kitchen, and find the item in question.
There are two strategies I used to combat this: the first was to have the kitchen divided into logical areas; the second to label things.
When you divide the kitchen into logical areas, it becomes easier to remember where things are kept. For instance, all things used in baking (measuring spoons, cups, sifters, scrapers, cookie press, rolling pin) are stored in one drawer. Below them is the cabinet that contains the flour, sugar, etc. There is a hot drink area: on the counter is the coffee pot and the electric kettle. Below is the cabinet with all teas, coffees and cocoas, the coffee grinder, teapot etc. All spices are kept in one area in the pantry.
The second part is to use my labeler in the kitchen. All spices are plainly labeled. The pantry baskets are labeled with their contents: breads, snacks, crackers, chips. If it becomes necessary, I will label the inside of the drawers/cabinets with the logical area they correspond to.
Doing these two things has cut down a lot on my having to search things out in the kitchen. It’s minimal time saved, but cutting down the interruptions means I don’t have to pay the switching cost. It also has the added benefit of having things put away when clean instead of left on the counter because “I didn’t know where it went.”
Lost Items
People lose things. Even I, who am very conscious of where I put things down, will occasionally misplace things. But rather than dropping everything to help people figure out where they left their stuff, I work to make them more self-sufficient.
Tile
My husband is always searching for his keys and his phone. I bought him a key finder one year, and you guessed it, he promptly lost it. (Of course it wasn’t attached to his keys). Now all three of us have Tile devices on our keychains and the Tile app on our phones. The phone can ring the keys, and the keys can ring the phone (even on silent). No more lost keys or phones. This saves me at least half an hour a week.
Landing Pads
My daughter would come in the door from school and start dropping things in a path that led to the kitchen table. Then I would pick things up for dinner, and paper would get lost.
Our butler’s pantry, right off the kitchen, is only used when we entertain. So I cleared off the top and that became my daughter’s landing pad. It’s an absolute disaster most days, but at least the disaster is contained, and she knows that all of her school stuff is somewhere in the pile. This puts the responsibility on her, and saves me about ten minutes a day that I used to use to get things corralled so we could eat, and an additional hour a week looking for her lost homework.
Cooking
Along with managing a house since the age of 14, I have been producing meals for myself and others for that long. I’ll be honest: I’m over it. But no one else had the cooking skills necessary. (And I’ll give you another moment of honesty. I had to figure out this cooking thing, and I don’t understand why others can’t read a cookbook and learn like I did. Anyway.)
My husband has gotten to the point where he can follow reasonably simple recipes. My daughter is coming along. But if we are pressed for time? We have frozen meals that any of us can pop in the oven.
But the big time saver is the meal plan binder. There are six weeks’ worth of recipes, and we rotate through. I make my grocery lists from the recipes, and they are easy enough that anyone can cook them. I save about an hour each week with meal planning, and an hour each day that I don’t do the cooking. Win!
Conclusion
By empowering my daughter and husband to be more independent, I have given myself the gift of a lot of extra time. Have you experienced this phenomena? Share below.
